Temper Tantrum in Children - Finding a Solution to the Problem
By Andrew Loh
Just imagine how you feel when you want to program your new LED TV and
are not able to do it, no matter how hard you try, just because it is
too complicated. It is so frustrating and disappointing that you will
bang your foot on the floor, throw the manual away or just walk away
with anger. Now, here is your version of tantrum, the adult temper
tantrum on the show! Just remember that even your children may show
temper tantrum, as adults tend to show sometimes. Young children always
try to acquire new and fresh skills to make their lives better and
productive. However, when they fail to accomplish a certain task, they
turn over to the only tool that exists with them to vent their
frustrations - a temper tantrum. Frustrations are parts of every child
in this world and they are unavoidable, as they try to learn how people,
objects and things work in nature.
Temper tantrums in children are very common especially when they are
2 years old . As children pick up important life skills, tantrums
tend to decrease. The best way to deal with temper tantrum is to avoid
it to happen in the first place. Here are some of the simple methods and
strategies that you can use control temper tantrum in children.
Make sure that you are giving enough attention to your children. Your
children should not show tantrum, just because they are not getting
enough attention from you. A child always requires some sort of
attention even if it is negative. A parent's response to an incidence of
tantrum should be proper in a way that some kind of attention is
necessary even if it is negative. Make sure that you give focused
attention to your children that means rewarding your children with
attention for an incidence of positive behavior.
Offer some form of choices or options. This will help your
children learn independent skills that are necessary for their societal
growth. For example, you can offer some minor options like:
Do you want to do your homework before or after playing?
Do you want milk or juice to drink?
Do you want to do your homework before or after watching
If you ask a direct question to your children, their answers would be a
definite “no”. Children always focus on one thing or issue at a time.
Therefore, you may need to train them to work with different options or
Many a time, distraction could be the best medicine to control
incidences of temper. Children always have very short attention span.
You can always take advantage of their short attention spans. Make sure
that you offer an alternative offer when your children display temper
tantrum. A new activity or choice may cajole your children to replace
the feeling of frustration and dismay. You can even change the
Children love to learn new skills. They always try to imbibe new
techniques and skills while attempting a particular task. In nature,
children move from simple tasks to complicated ones. To make this a
possibility, you can consider the following:
When your child demands something, consider the request
very carefully. Consider the merit of the demand. Some of the demands
may be outrageous in nature. Take a wise decision before conceding to
Set a limit for your children. Never ever take your
children to shopping, if you know that they have the habit of making
demands. Ensure that you teach your children why exorbitant demands are
bad for them.
Hitting and spanking should never a part of your tantrum correction
procedures. Physical tactics and methods are negative and
counter-productive. With these procedures, you are sending an indirect
message to your children that using physical procedures is perfectly OK.
They will use the same procedures when they grow up and become adults.
Before you try any of the techniques, just sit down for some time and
think over the real problem.
Every incidence of temper tantrum has its own cause. You may need to
handle the tantrum based on its merits. If you feel that the reasons are
silly and frivolous, then you may need to put your foot down very hard
to resist the temptation to accede to the child's unfair demand. On the
other hand, if your child has some genuine problems (like tying
shoelaces or buttoning the shirt), then you may need to intervene and
teach your children how to perform the task.
The main reason for temper tantrum to arise is when a child senses that
someone is refusing something to him or her. If parents refuse
something, then children may show frustration in the form of temper
tantrum. If the demand is genuine and fair, parents can intervene to
defuse the situation by distracting the mind to some other things or
Temper is natural to all of us. It is so in the case of children too.
However, uncontrolled displays of temper tantrum could be a dangerous
sign especially if it goes on for a long time. Medical intervention may
be necessary for those children, who show long spells of tantrum every
day and throughout the week.
What to Do When Your Temper Flares: A Kid's Guide to Overcoming Problems With Anger (What to Do Guides for Kids)
By Dawn Huebner, Ph.D
Did you know that anger is like fire? It starts with a
spark, igniting us with energy and purpose. But it can also
blaze out of control, causing lots of problems. If you're a
kid whose temper quickly flares, a kid whose anger gets too
big, too hot, too fast, this book is for you. What to Do
When Your Temper Flares guides children and their parents
through the cognitive-behavioral techniques.
Engaging examples, lively illustrations, and step-by-step instructions
teach children a set of "anger dousing" methods aimed at cooling angry
thoughts and controlling angry actions, resulting in calmer, more effective kids.