Parenting Styles - Differing Styles and Common Goals
By Andrew Loh
Parenting is a tricky and challenging issue. Parents keep trying their
best to find newer and better parenting methods that actually work in
the real world. Some of these methods are extremely useful and
beneficial, while others are not so. Some of the methods used may be
smooth and flexible in approach, while others may be a bit on the
harsher side. Methods those are smooth and flexible, adopt a softer
approach, while parenting approaches that use harsher methods may be curt
Whatever the method parents use to raise their children, it is their
choice and sole prerogative. Parents choose their methods according to
their convenience, needs and requirements apart from the demands that
arise from time to time. Parenting is a worldwide issue and thousands of
books, articles and manuals published by hundreds of publishers try to
give wonderful tips on how to raise/parent children in a holistic
manner. Some of these are extremely useful, provide useful tips while
others are repetitive, and give common tips that every parent already knows
Child developmental psychologists have been showing their academic
interest on how parents can influence the development of their children.
However, pinpointing a particular parenting method that results in
assured results is often very difficult. Some of the children raised in
similar environments may later grow up in significantly dissimilar
personality types. Parenting is always a challenging issue that needs
serious consideration from every parent.
In spite of all parenting challenges, child psychologists provide useful
information on how parenting styles will affect the brain and physical
development in children. A noted psychologist, Diana Baumrind, was
successful identifying four important and critical issues of parenting.
These parental issues are as follows:
Strategies that rely on disciplining
Strategies that rely on warmth, affection, empathy and nurturing
Strategies that rely on different communication styles
Strategies that rely on expecting a sense of maturity and control
Based on the dimensions mentioned above, Baumrind suggested four
different levels of parenting styles. Most parents in the world belong
to one or more of these styles. Some parents may even use all of them to
get better results. These four parenting styles are given below:
Authoritarian or demanding style
In this style of parenting, parents will be the enforcers of rigid
rules. Children will have to follow the rules set and enforced by the
parents. Failure to follow set rules will always result in punishment.
Nobody knows why authoritative parents act in such a manner. In many
instances, these parents may demand too much from their parents. In
addition, they might even be unresponsive to their children's needs.
These parents also expect their children to follow their rules without
Authoritative or firm style
Like authoritarian parents, those who try to establish rules and
regulations, belong to this parenting style. However, these parents are
not too rigid like an authoritarian parent. In fact, most of these
parents are democratic in nature and are amenable to mutual discussion.
These parents are ready to listen to their children and accommodate to
their needs and requirements. They are also forgiving and easy-going in
nature. They are extremely assertive, but not excessively demanding,
restricting and assertive. The methods they use are supporting in nature
and they rarely use harsh punishments, unless there is a real need.
Permissive or liberal style
These parents are indulging and mixing in nature, and they rarely demand
something from their children. In fact, they may have very low-level of
expectations from their children. They are more responsive and
supporting than other parents. They are not too traditional, nor are
they confronting with their children. Permissive parents are
cooperative, communicative and helpful in their nature. They treat their
children as their real friends.
Uninvolved or impassive style
An uninvolved or impassive parent may never demand anything from
children. They show very low response to their children's needs and
requirements. They readily help their children with their basic needs.
However, they also display a sense of detachment from their children's life.
In some case, they may remain aloof to neglect their children's needs
Whatever the parenting styles are, one thing is certain here: parenting
style should undergo periodical changes, as and when needs and situations
arise. In fact, parenting is a subtle combination of needs, expediency,
demands and children's nature. Parents may need to adjust to the
existing situations and act accordingly to get the best from their
children. In fact, parenting involves an ever-evolving, two-way channel
that traverses a well-chartered course with occasional instances of
course correction. In the end, all parents have one common goal, which
is to make their children well mannered, obedient, intelligent and
smart. Continue to read
Parenting Styles - What Are The Effects On Children?