Practical and Useful Tips on Making Your Children Optimistic and Expectant
By Andrew Loh
Teaching and making your children understand the benefits of being
optimistic and expectant in their life is time consuming and task
oriented. In fact, it may take a considerable amount of time to make
your children realize the importance of staying optimistic and
expectant. Here are some tips and suggestions to teach your child
how he or she can learn about optimism and expectancy:
Help and assist your children taste and experience what success
really is: Success is sweet and encouraging! It also addictive and
cajoling! When you child tastes his or her first success, he or she
will be encouraged to repeat it many more times. Success is also a
big precursor to unlimited self esteem and confidence! Ensure that
you help your children taste some basic success. One simple thing is
to assign basic household chore and ask them to finish off the task
within a predetermined time. It could be anything, from arranging
all the cutlery and crockery on the table. Or, it could be just
arranging their room by putting way toys and playthings.
Outcome: Your child will feel very proud of you because you allowed
him or her to finish assigned task with so much success! Your child
will also feel confident and courageous enough to repeat the task
Soon after achieving success, give credit for all the hard they have
done: When you assign a task and when you see your children
completing the assigned task with success, your main duty is to
assign credit for their success and congratulate them for future
ones. Tell them that they were so dedicated in their work and how
they worked so intelligently to complete the assigned task. You can
use the following encouraging keywords like:
Outcome: This simple exercise can raise your child's optimism and
expectancy to high levels. He or she can feel that they can do any
jobs with ease and efficiency. Self initiation and self efficiency
are two of the important outcomes of this exercise.
In times of difficulty, ask probing questions by taking care not to
criticize: At times, your children are bound to fail in some of the
assigned tasks. These could be securing low grades in the class or
even failing to do assigned household chore in the assigned time. If
this happens, your main duty is not to criticize your children, but
to teach them how effectively they can use their ability to finish a
pending task with a fair degree of success.
Let us say that your child fails to do a simple mathematical
formula, and as a result he or she gets a zero mark for the answer.
It is natural that your child will be agitated, angry and tearful!
Now, you may wish to ask your child what exactly happened while
writing the answer. It is possible that your child may forget the
formula or your child was too nervous to write answer to that
question. Once you get a possible input, your next task is to show
your child how he or she can tackle the question and in what manner
time can be saved while answering the question. Once your child
learns these tricks, he or she will feel confident and encouraged to
attempt answering similar questions with a sense of success.
Outcome: Questions can bring answers! Probing and inquisitive
questions can bring really intelligent answers. You can easily
validate your child's pent up feelings, but ask probing questions
that can cause or make them to see and observe things more
optimistically and in a positive manner.
Teach your child ever instance of failure is a stepping stone for
future success: Children always fail in life! It is quite natural!
Things can wrong at any time and any place. Even adults do lot of
mistakes and fail in their duties! When things go wrong, you may
need to approve and understand your children's feelings. You may
also wish to help and assist them focus on all future assignments.
Teach them that there is always another time to reach success. You
may also need to tell them how failure can help them learn mistakes
Example: Let us say that your child scores low grades in his class.
You may not need to yell at him or her for those low scores.
Instead, you can easily tell your child a couple of encouraging
"May be that you had a bad day! You can do well next time. But, you
can do better if you do your work properly"
"You will be great next time"
Outcome: These simple things will help your child learn and
understand that failure is a stepping stone to future success, and
that today's failure was good for me to understand all those errors
and wrong things that really caused the failure.
Optimism and expectancy are two of the most cherished characters
that either make or break the life of any person. Being optimistic
is an antidote to life's possible failures and disappointments. When
you children learn and master these two traits, they will be on
their path to achieve success and glory.